Are you applying to grad school soon? Are you in need of references for your first job? Can you only remember the names of 1 of your college professors even though you graduated 8 months ago? Not all of us had the foresight to form eternal bonds with our professors…
humor
United Airlines Made Me Flush my Emotional Support Leprechaun Down the Toilet
Having an emotional support leprechaun sham-ROCKED while it lasted. Almost one year ago today, on St Patrick’s Day 2017, I followed a rainbow and found a leprechaun dozing at the end of it. I could tell this leprechaun was an emotional support leprechaun because he immediately walked up to me,…
NRA Makes Move to Arm Nation’s Class Hamsters
There is a proposal in the works to put guns in the hands of class pets around the nation. The obvious answer to ending gun violence in schools is arming every living being in the classroom that’s not a student. The National Rifle Association believes putting guns in the furry…
A Letter to Floridians from the Sun
To: Floridians From: CEO of Florida, The Sun Subject: Downsizing and Demanding More Respect Dear Floridians, Listen up! The date is officially March 1st which kicks off Florida Summer. As you know we don’t celebrate Spring here. We only have two seasons: Basically Summer and Summer, and we are now…
How I Found Love on the Trump Dating Website
Before yesterday I had never tried online dating in my life. When a friend sent me the link to Trump.dating.com I was apprehensive. With today’s political climate I’m embarrassed to even wear my “Hillary for Prison” t- shirt outside, much less set up a profile declaring my love for Donald…
7 Stupid News Stories that Will Make You Feel Like a Genius
Are you feeling bad about yourself today? Do you feel like you just can’t do anything right lately? It’s easy to be hard on yourself and over-analyze your actions. No matter how badly you think you’ve messed up, it’s nothing compared to the people in these stupid news stories. When…
Pocket Dictionary of Winter Olympics Terms
The 2018 Winter Olympics are upon us. NBC is really excited. The 2018 Winter Olympians are really excited. Show of hands, Is anyone else really excited? I understand that the Winter Olympics are a special time when the great nations of this world can huddle in groups and freeze together.…
I’ve Decided to Have a Baby so I Can be a Mommy Blogger
Everyone loves mommy blogs. Mommy blogs are like the superhero movies of the blogging world. People can’t look away from the action packed life of the mom. Mommy blogs cover everything from new gluten-free cookie recipes to creative ways to make babies stop crying that don’t involve suffocation. I’m convinced…
An Open Letter to the English Degree Hanging on the Wall of my Parent’s House
I still remember when I mounted you for the first time. Mounted you to the wall that is. You were shiny, new, and impressive. I was so proud of you. I posted pictures of us together with my arm around you with captions like, “Look world! Me and my degree!…